Unable to see my tall blonde city slicker, I walk past the bar in search for him.
From the corner of my eye, I spot a small creepy man hiding in a doorway. Tightening my grip on my bag whilst feeling for my perfume to act as pepper spray and reaching for my keys ready to jab him in the eye. I pick up my pace as this small podgy man begins to lurk out of the shadows…..aaahhh following me! Great, where the hell is my date?
Walking faster as I search frantically for my phone, I hear my name being called from behind me…Oh god please don’t say that creepy man is my date?! (more…)
After weeks of texting and his endless stream of Snapchat selfies (a little vain perhaps, but at least I know he looks like his pictures and that is HOT!)
Squeezing into my Sandy from Grease trousers and a belly full of nerves, I jump on the tube and venture across the river to Camden, North London.
I spot my date in the distance – it is hard not too, when he is that fit! – gliding along ‘on Cloud 9’ and beaming from ear to ear, I suddenly feel an almighty crash… is my heel caught in the pavement? No it’s reality smashing me in the knee caps!
My plan to turn up looking fantastic and stunning him into a state of seduction was becoming something of a distant dream, as I wandered around attached to Google Maps like a lost tourist, in torrential rain – I finally admitted defeat and called him… (more…)
Date night had arrived and I was excited to finally be meeting this tall, dark and handsome man but that feeling was short lived, when my eyes fell upon a small unattended child waving at me from across the road. Turning around in search of the mother of this poor abandoned child, I realised that no, there was no such woman and that this was no child…this was in fact my date! (more…)