The Height Conspiracy


Over the past 2 years of being single – The first part was spent hibernating away from men, crying into wine glasses and rubbing my mascara smeared face all over my pillows. Yes, I pretty much rocked that post break up look!

The second part  was when I wiped off those panda eye’s, threw on some heels  and dramatically catapulted myself back into the world dating and what an experience it has been…From cringy dates to emotionally unstable men, there is one main thing I have learnt:

  • Men lie about their height 

What I love most about this, is that for some deranged reason these men seem to think we won’t notice? i mean, I’m severely short sighted but even I can tell when I’m towering over someone like a wind ravaged palm tree, half crookedly leaning down to at least be able to hear from my oh so high height of 5’3.

  • 5’10 it seems is man code for 5’1

There is nothing wrong with being short but be upfront about it, otherwise it feels like we’ve been lured onto the date under false pretences. It’s like online shopping – I order a pair of gorgeous 6 inch patent black stilettos and in its place I am delivered a pair of tedious suede kitten heels – I would be sorely disappointed as  I was mis-sold a product! The truth is men are like shoes:

  • We know what shoe fits us
  • What type / style of shoe we like
  • Most importantly, We know exactly how we want our shoes to look (as shallow as that may be)

And unlike online shopping we can’t send our tinder dates back when they turn up looking completely different to the photo advertised. Although we could run and hide, but that’s just plain mean…instead we do the courteous thing (that only women do) stay for a little while and then make our excuses.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s