Month: September 2014

The Sex God

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Drooling as this bronzed Adonis walks through the bar – parting the hoards of women like Moses parting the seas – Oh My God this is my date and he is fitter than his pictures!

I can barely lift my jaw off the floor as he comes striding towards me with such perfectly chiselled features – he would be much more suited to a billboard (preferably one where he’s only wearing boxers!) than this bar. (more…)

The not so musician – Coming to a tube station near you…

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Standing outside in the blistering wind and losing control of one contact lens – to the point that I am squinting so much that I now resemble a one-eyed pirate – is not a good look when attempting to find my date! (more…)

The Accidental Date

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After losing track of who I was talking to, I had agreed to go on a date, only to realise 10 seconds later that I had replied to the wrong guy – I had now committed myself to a date with a man who looked alarmingly like a hamster? (more…)

The perks of being single

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Having spent the evening with my favourite bosom buddy ‘Blossom Hill’ and losing myself in a full blown Bridget Jones marathon (which naturally resulted in a slight white wine melt down as I evaluated my life), I came to the conclusion that I was slowly becoming Miss B Jones herself or at the very least a version of! (more…)

The Valentine from hell

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Last year I bizarrely agreed to a first date on Valentine’s Day, in my defence I had completely lost track of the days that week and had no idea that it would work out to be actually on Valentine’s Day!

As soon as I realised I did everything in my power to try to reschedule – I became so desperate that I told him I could not make it due to family problems. When that did not work I began to scrape the barrel of terrible excuses by saying I had a longstanding doctor’s appointment (which made no sense as the date was in the evening)! Yet he still refused to take no for an answer – this should have been a warning sign for what was to come… (more…)

Familiar Faces…

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On Saturday night, whilst out on a cocktail fuelled evening, I found myself surrounded by some very familiar faces…

At first I thought nothing of it and just assumed that I had probably seen them out in one of the bars earlier on…it wasn’t until I had arm wrestled my way through the crowds of congregating people, all hoarding around the bar, that I somehow fell into a dispute with the man next to me – as to who would be served first. (more…)

In which I became the crazy one

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My plan to turn up looking fantastic and stunning him into a state of seduction was becoming something of a distant dream, as I wandered around attached to Google Maps like a lost tourist, in torrential rain – I finally admitted defeat and called him… (more…)